The Real-Life Carmela Who Refuses to Go Away

Who I Am — and Why You’re Reading This

I’m not writing this for nostalgia. I’m writing it because I’m owed $20 million, stolen by my ex-husband Ben Douglas — the same man who acted as fixer for RS Investments, a mutual fund company that, behind closed doors, was laundering money for global human traffickers.

They could pay me what they owe. I’d still talk — just from first class instead of a tent. Since they haven’t, here’s the whole story.

The Christmas Party That Told Me Everything

Ben had just landed a powerful new job at RS Investments. Big money. I was proud of him.

We went to their Christmas party. Within minutes, I was standing in the center of a forming circle of older, wealthy men. They looked like they were having trouble breathing.

Ben was the air.

RS Investments Was Already in Trouble

What I didn’t know: RS Investments was circling the drain.

Eliot Spitzer, then Attorney General of New York, had them in his sights. He was going after mutual funds, busting fraud, making billionaires sweat. These men were terrified.

Ben Douglas — Not Just General Counsel, but Their Lifeline

Officially, Ben was General Counsel. Unofficially, he was the one who could make their criminal problems disappear.

They called him at all hours. He was the difference between prison and freedom.

Publicly, RS was just another mutual fund. Privately, it was a money-laundering front for international human trafficking networks.

The SEC Hits — and the Fall Guy

In 2004, the SEC fined RS Investments $25 million.

Steve Cohen — the lowest-ranking executive — was banned from finance for life. The top brass got minor fines.

Ben? He was exalted as their savior.

Inside the Circle of Power

We stayed in their Tahoe mansions for long vacations. They gave Ben million-dollar bonuses. Even the internal “watchdog” — the one supposedly keeping them honest — got lavish payouts to stay loyal.

The Masterstroke: Selling RS Investments to a Life Insurance Company

Ben orchestrated the sale — not to another mutual fund or hedge fund, but to a life insurance company.

The price? Massive. Top brass, middle brass, even some lower brass — everyone got “fuck-you” money.

The Staged Calm and the Purge

For two years, Terry (one of the original executives) stayed on as CEO. Everything looked stable. That calm was staged.

Two years later, a new CEO with zero experience in mutual funds or hedge funds took over. Within six months, nearly everyone was fired.

It was a deliberate purge — erasing both evidence and the people who held it.

Steve Cohen’s Suspicious Death

Steve Cohen had been with RS from the start. He got nothing from the sale. Furious, he flew back from South Africa for high-level meetings with the RS leadership. Ben was at every one.

A month later — one month before his wedding — Steve “committed suicide.”

I don’t buy it. Not with what he knew. Not after how angry he was.

This Wasn’t Mismanagement — It Was a Cover-Up

Get the money. Eliminate anyone who knows too much. Lock the doors behind you.

I see my ex-husband’s fingerprints all over it. Ben was never the top guy — but this was the work of someone who knew exactly how to dismantle both a company and a criminal enterprise without leaving a trail.

It’s Criminal Money — and It’s Mine

Before anyone says, “It’s dirty money anyway” — yes. Exactly. That’s why they shouldn’t have it either.

But it’s also mine. And I intend to collect.

The Demand

I don’t care about RS Investments anymore. There are bigger fish for me to fry.

What I want is my $20 million. Pay me — or I burn down your whole damn lives.